The Darkness, the Dervish, and the Vardapet: Part vi

‘Hey! Hey!’ An Armenian priest was stooping over Ibrahim, shouting, and rubbing his hands and face. They were at the edge of an icefield, high in the mountains of Hakkari. Around them the snow lay light on the rocks, the wind catching and blowing it down towards the valley. The sun was thin and pale behind wispy gray cloud. It was perhaps noon. Hajji Ibrahim opened his eyes, blinked, sat up, and stared out in the distance, trying to recollect his thoughts. The vardapet sat down beside him and pulled a blanket over him.

‘Who are you? Where am I? Where are the others?’ After a moment Hajji Ibrahim spoke, in a blank, monotone voice, to no one in particular. He weakly waved his arms about, then sat back against the stone. Vardapet Gevorg replied, ‘We, my companions and I, were in a village on the lower slopes of this mountain. We are passing through these cursed hills, on our way to Erchitzian, on account of a rebellion among the Kurds south of Bitlis. The khan of Hakkari is—never mind though. I am Vardapet Gevorg, and this is Vardapet Shiroyan. Over there is a boy from the village, a Mehmed I think. We are in the midst of the lands of the khan of Hakkari, though I am not sure where exactly we are, to be honest. We became lost two days ago in a snowstorm and only by the grace and providence of God we found our way into a village near here.’

‘The mountains of Hakkari? How—how did I arrive here? Are you speaking the truth? Swear to me on the Gospel sent down from God that you are speaking the truth!’

‘I swear to you! To the east of here are the lands of the Persian shah, I am quite certain. The road we were following crossed another path coming in from the east, and some days ago, before the snowstorm, we met a group of peddlers who had only the day before been forced to pay a toll to exit the Safavi lands, of which they complained for quite some time to us… Whether shah or sultan has any writ in these lands, I do not know. Some strength greater than either seems to be about, though. So it feels, at least. I am not sure…’

Hajj Ibrahim blinked, and nodded. ‘Your sense is right, I am afraid. But you would not believe what I have seen. I do not believe what I have seen, but I am certain of one thing. This morning I was in the hills north of Halab, I swear to you on our Prophet and upon the exalted Qur’an. My companions and I—though I do not know whither they have gone—took refuge in a cave from bedouin. Then—then I awoke in a place full of terror, a well of hell, beyond all story and knowledge… But I will not speak further of it here. I do not know how I arrived here, I do not know where my companions are… We take refuge in God… a well of hell…’ He sat back and began to shiver violently. Gevorg motioned to Shiroyan and the two lifted Ibrahim up, his hands trembling, his legs barely able to move. They noticed that it seemed as if all the color had drained from his face and his hands. ‘How… why… you came?’ He muttered as they bore him down off the boulder field to the edge of the scraggly tree line, below which the boy Mehmed was now waiting with one of their horses.

‘We saw a fantastic light exploding and enveloping the mountain, whirling around it all night. In the morning I had to come and see; it is a habit of mind to seek out strange and rare things, you see. So we struggled up from the village and came to this place, and saw you—and tongues of blue flame up above, higher on the cliffs and the ice. It was… ungodly. Never have I seen such a thing, or heard tell of it save in stories. My grandmother used to tell me of such things, but only in fun, or so I thought…’

They gingerly lifted Ibrahim onto the horse, and he slumped forward and weakly grasped the animal’s neck. Then, slowly, they worked back down the mountain, retracing their tracks in the snow, the trees growing taller and darker, the snow denser and heavier. On and on they went, retracing their steps, though it seemed as if the time needed had doubled since their first passing. The sun was setting. Behind them Vardapet Shiroyan could have sworn that he heard shrieks and moans in the blackening forest, but he chose not to mention them to the others—fear lay on all well enough. Night fell, but the moon was bright, and lit the snowy forests and wastes in an erie glow. Two hours after night had fallen, the temperature dropping rapidly, they reached the edge of the village. It huddled along a precipitous ridge plunging down from the icy peaks behind, the two or three streets—paths, really—threading the village dropping down endless steps and stairs, the houses all but piled one upon another, like terraces. The boy Mehmed, as they drew nearer to the village, had suddenly bolted and run home, leaving the two vardapets and the barely conscious merchant alone.

The village was completely silent, and every door was locked, with only tiny glimmers of light coming from under the cracks. The windows were all locked shut. They could see Mehmed’s tracks disappear into the fourth house from the edge of the village, but despite knocking repeatedly no one answered, even so much as to shoo them away—a marked contrast from the hospitality, if someone bemused, of the very same people earlier in the day. What had changed?

By now they were quite tired, and cold, and the horse was limping, exhausted from the snow. They furiously banged on every door, slogging through the snow banks from house to house, yelling and cursing, growing more frantic with fear and frustration, even as their bodies burned and ached, their fingers and faces bitter and cold. No one would open, nor even make a sound from within. At one house they heard furious whispers and a low wail, then silence. In frustration, they returned to the center of the village, an irregular meydan where two roads—paths, really—intersected. They eased Haci Ibrahim down from his mount and let him rest against the saddle bags, but as they did, the horse turned wild with fright and bolted into the night. Vardapet Gevorg threw up his hands in desperation, but as he did, he recalled the tiny village shrine, up on a knoll at the back of the village. Perhaps they could force their way within and stay there for the night?

So, lifting Haci Ibrahim to his feet and leading him behind them, they pushed up the hill to the shrine of the village saint, an Ereklı Dede, a holy man of some distant or not-so-distant past. It was a half-crumbling domed box of a structure, the dome barely visible in the heaps of snow, gnarled old fir trees hunched around the walls, a thin light streaming through a mostly covered-over window. Someone was inside. They pounded furiously on the door, and, against hope, it opened. A hunched-over old man, a dervish of some sort, wearing headgear stood in the doorway, his tongue lolling and his hair wild and disheveled. Fear was in his eyes. He stared at them with his wild eyes, then cried: ‘In the name of God, the Forty Men of the Unseen, our Master’s herd of holy deer, and the Green One, enter, you’re no spirits, no! Well, in you go, now!’ The old man slammed the door shut behind them, bolted it, and paced about the interior of the shrine, muttering imprecations and jumbled Arabic-sounding formulas all the while, swinging his hands back and forth, his long matted hair swaying.

After a few moments of pacing, interspersed with long intense gazes at the guests, he turned to face them and cried out in a loud and high pitched voice, ‘They’ve awoken! My shaykh, God enlighten his spirit-face, yes, yes, foresaw ‘em, he did, in the world of dreams one night, he saw… Listen to me! It was terrible, terrible, we take refuge in the Almighty! They came last night, at midnight, right at midnight. Took a whole family, I swear, a whole family, just walked right through the door, it was locked and all. We found them in the morning, all of ‘em as white as fresh linens, looking like they’d seen Shaytan himself, worse maybe. Not dead. Not alive either. Breathing, sitting up, but that was it. I pricked each one of them, I did, with a needle, just blood came out, blood turned all white, I swear on the grave of our shaykh Ereklı Dede! Then we found the goat—it was inside out, would you believe me! Insides all on the outside, and not a lick of blood, but walking around, silent as death, just the back of its eyes going back and forth looking at us. One of the locals went crazy seeing it, went after it with a big old blade, lopped the head clean off. You know what happened?’ At this he positively jumped up and down, his dirty long hair sloshing from side to side, grinning and grimacing by turns. ‘Goat just hopped around, guts swinging this and that a way, and butted the fellow with his stub of a neck, you know, marrow and veins and skin poking up, and—hey presto! Just popped his head right back on, took off for the wilds, skipping and prancing and making nary a bleat. Silent as death, I say. Same as the family they came for. I mean, they took off to, we haven’t seen them since. Awful, just awful!’

He fell silent, and retreated to a little alcove at the back of the shrine, the noise of his shuffling in some books or loose papers coming dimly from behind the wooden sepulchre. The vardapets and the merchant had by now sat down and positively slumped against the wall, their heads spinning and aching, silently soaking in the warmth of the charcoal brazier the old man had burning next to his mattress, which was itself wedged between a wall and the tomb of the saint. He quite clearly lived here, tending the shrine and attending to the spiritual needs of the villagers. A couple of candles were burning down on a stone at one end of the tomb, which was itself overlaid with a beautiful green fabric interlaced with designs of flowers and trees. The ceiling was low and close, and the rafters were crammed with deer antlers, the skulls of birds, bits of talismanic paper and votive rags, all sooted with black, some deeply, some slightly, from years of candles burning and the dervish’s brazier in the winter. Coffee paraphernalia littered one corner, while in another there were a couple of pieces of bread, a jug of water, and what looked like some dried fruits, the dervish’s meager diet, not doubt. The dervish returned, clutching some pages, which he deposited in front of his exhausted guests. ‘Bread? Coffee?’ he asked, and they accepted the bread, and some water, asking if perhaps there were anything more for the clearly ill merchant. The dervish seemed quite thrilled by this request for some reason, as he had a small hearth and enough cooking things to make some soup. Before he did, he motioned to the just deposited pages. ‘Read! Read!’ The vardapets picked them up, but they were all written in Arabic, which they did not know. They could decipher the vivid, if rather crude, illustrations though: in them, dark spirits rose from the earth, their visages followed in consecutive pages by images of humans and animals turned topsy-turvy and rendered in horrifying, unnatural colors and shapes. Finally, on a page at the bottom of the heap, was the image of a great seething void, Arabic magical phrases and numbers and prayers scribbled in minuscule hands all around the margins, confining the foul being to the center of the page. Vardapet Gevorg shivered, and began to repeat a prayer under his breath.

Haci Ibrahim had barely managed to stay awake once he settled onto the ground of the shrine, his back against a thin bolster, the cold melting out of his bones. Only the sharp pain of hunger and thirst held him back, his mind a tangle of sensations and barely cogent. He gathered very little of what the dervish said, his words coming and fading, but anyway he already knew everything, having seen it, seen it all in a moment, a counter-revelation, an inner experience yes but a strange and infernal one, for which he came up short in explanations that comforted him at all. We take refuge in God… The two vardapets were chattering in their funny tongue… What strange colors, what strange shapes overhead, these mountain shrines, so interesting… he lifted his head as one of the vardapets gave him water to drink and some bread and dried fruit to eat, he slowly chewed, tasted every particle his mind following every bite back into cosmic origins, divine oneness, how tired he was, so tired… a little of the hot soup, his throat burned, but that was all…

In his sleep he passed over Mount Kaf, gliding, like a crane or stork, his heart quiet and peaceful. Coming to rest on a cypress tree beyond the world, he found himself reciting odd lines of verse, which he had never heard and which followed no rules or order he knew in waking life.

There is a river of fire before the Throne. There is a river of stars being born.
There is a basin of holy boiling blood. There is a fountain of dying stars.

There is a river of the flaming interiors of hearts being transfigured and transfixed
By His gaze, the force that quickens and wrecks every world in every configuration,
In every spin of the dervish’s dance a billion worlds are born on other planes.
The contours past place, his heart became inscribed with the Divine Names
A map not scribed by hands, ‘this’ and ‘that’ passing away, passing away…

When Haci Ibrahim awoke it was well into the morning, but the snow was coming down again, big heavy flakes now, only the almost silent sound of snow on snow filtering under the door through the window. The two vardapets were soundly sleeping, wrapped in colorful Turkman blankets. Haci Ibrahim found that he too had been wrapped in such a blanket. It smelled of horses and distance. His head ached, the un-sound of the snow was almost too much, it was too quiet. The dervish was awake, or at least he was sitting up, cross-legged, but he was silent. His lips were moving, wordlessly. Haci Ibrahim watched him, wondering under the pressure of his throbbing head. He stirred a little, and asked himself silently whether there was coffee to be had here. The dervish opened his until then closed eyes and spoke, looking directly into Haci Ibrahim. ‘Yes, yes, we’ll drink and be merry soon, soon, my son. And then!’ The dervish stopped speaking for a moment, his eyes dancing. ‘Then, then my son, you’re in for a show! Yes, quite a show. The saints are coming! The saints are coming! A whole host of ‘em—just you wait!’

Haci Ibrahim had no idea what the wild dervish meant about the coming of the saints, though little of what had happened over the last few days—or was it weeks, or months, or years?—made much sense to him. ‘My son! My son!’ The dervish was now standing, positively dancing about with joy or glee, and gesturing at Haci Ibrahim, which caused the vardapets to awake and stir. ‘Look out the door, go, now, look!’ Ibrahim slowly lifted himself, thinking it best to humor their host. The blanket stilled wrapped around himself, for the shrine was quite cold, he pushed open the door, snowflakes gathering about his head and gently whitening the red and yellows of the blanket. Silence without. But the space beyond the shrine was not empty. Not by far. Above the pillowing snow banks, as silent as the fallen snow, an ethereal herd of magnificent deer, half antlered, half not, stood guard around the shrine, their hooves resting lightly upon the surface of the snow, their bodies awash in holy light, alert, nimble, waiting. The saints were coming, and the holy deer of Ereklı Dede would greet them when they came. And then…

15.2-17-1994-Broderet-turbandaekke

Part i

Part ii

Part iii

Part iv

Part v

The Darkness, the Dervish, and the Vardapet: Part iii

17th of Shawwal, 1118 [January 22, 1707]. In the name of God, the compassionate, the merciful. We take refuge in Him from every hidden danger, and from every imagination of evil, and from every whispering of Shaytan. And peace and blessings upon Muhammad and upon his house and upon all his followers and saints, amen.

As for what follows: in brief, my brother, I, the miserable sinner Hajj Ibrahīm Efendī, and my companions, are now sojourning in Van, having slowly and with much danger and toil made our way from Bitlis up the shore of the lake, through deep snows and in danger from bandits. But I will not linger in telling you of these things, for,

When the rose of divine majesty is in splendid flower/ All other scents and blooms lose their power,

and what I began describing to you, in intimations and hints, in my last letter, outweighs my most recent troubles. First, before I resume my story, you should know, my brother, that everything is possessed of a spirit, breathed forth from the cosmic mirror, the universal Spirit. Time, place, this ink with which I am writing. Therein lies the secret of the worlds, and the ways in which the innumerable worlds are joined together, along an infinite number of spiritual doors, each spirit leading into another spirit, every particle meshed with every other particle, each a manifestation of the Divine Presence, in infinite particularity. The spirits are, of course, of varying strengths and degrees of self-knowledge, and of varying degrees of closeness to their Source, exalted is He. Some are very distant indeed, though, we take refuge in Him, they are all subordinate to His will, in the end. Still, my brother…

Second, you should know that what the polytheists of old called gods, my brother, are various in their realities, though none are truly gods, nor a part of God—may He be exalted over such! Some were merely the imaginations of men, or ancient heroes changed in time into deities. Others were jinn, good and bad, dwelling in various places, rocks, springs, trees. Still others were angels, taken by men with weak minds to be God Himself, or gods like unto Him. And others were lower, darker powers, formed of the Fire, yet without the Fire, invisible to us, and thirsty for other spirits, for flesh, blood, water, fire, wind, earth. We take refuge in God, exalted is He, from the hunger of these gnawing spirits, for, my brother, it is terrible. We have now seen them, and we fear what we have seen of them, and what we have seen of our lower selves in proximity to them.

I have told you these things, brother, so that what I relate to you now will not seem utterly unbelievable. As I mentioned in my previous letter, I was deeply discomfitted by my encounter with the mad saint in the street, but we did not change our plans, nor seek a delay, for we knew that winter would be upon us should we delay. Instead we set out from Damascus on the 6th of Jumada II, traveled north to Aleppo, sojourned there but briefly, resting and replenishing our supplies, then continuing north. Our next goal was Ayntab, but on the second day from Aleppo, as we crossed the stony open lands between Aleppo and Ayntab, we saw riders in the distance, so we stopped and dismounted so as to wait for them to arrive, for they had seen us and were approaching at great speed. My heart was in my throat, and I anxiously sought the intercessions of the Forty and the Martyrs of Badr. One of our traveling company, a Kurd from Mosul, was armed with a musket, which he loaded and held at his side. There were ten or twelve of us in the traveling company, some Shamis, some Kurds, others Rumis. Some of the others had swords, which they unsheathed. The riders came into sight. They seemed to be Bedouins, ten or eleven in number perhaps. One of them dismounted from a short distance away and walked up towards us. The brave Kurd from Mosul shouted to him in Arabic, “Stay! What do you want with our company of pious Muslims, who mean you and your people no harm?”

The Bedouin leader replied, “We want nothing, for now. This is our grazing land, and we wished to see who you might be, and whether you were sekbans or janissaries, but we see you are but merchants and pilgrims. We will depart now. Peace be with you.”

He returned to his riders, remounted, and they faded into the desert. We ourselves remounted our steeds and continued on, praising our brave Kurdish companion, but afraid that the Bedouin would return, and in greater numbers, before we could reach shelter. And as the evening approached, we rode along the edge of a deeply cut valley, stony and rough, looking for a safe place to camp, for we had not come to a village, and feared riding in the dark. Suddenly in the distance one of our number descried riders, still far off, but in greater numbers. Immediately, hoping they would not see us, we rode down into the deep ravine, and up along steadily rising cliffs, with a trickle of water beside. I paused, for my horse was winded from the descent into the ravine, and I was nearly trembling from weariness and fear. When I looked up, I saw two of our companions, still astride their horses, suddenly disappear into the side of the ravine! They had found a cave, carved into the living stone. I rode up to see, and myself entered within.

Would that we had not entered that foul place! But the Bedouin were many, and we were few, and we feared that they had seen us and would seek us in the ravine, and our first success in repelling them would not repeat itself. So we all led our horses inside, and quickly barricaded the door with stones and fallen timbers from within, leaving only a small opening for our musket to fire out if need be. We lit some candles and bore them into the depths of the grotto. We could now see the interior of this fabulous cave in more detail: it seemed to me to have been a cave of the earth, expanded and worked by skilled hands in ancient times. Fifty men could have with comfort resided therein, for the floor was wide and level, with five columns in the midst supporting the roof, which was the height of two men at least. But carved into the walls facing into the earth were shallow niches, arched at the tops, and in them were the most hideous and leering images I have ever seen, creatures with ragged teeth and sunken eyes, great rolls of fat and flesh and hair falling down their bodies, and fierce, curving claws and talons. Some had the heads of demons, others of fish or birds, but all were terrifying. In the center niche, instead of an image, there was a great round stone, black, oily even. Bits of bone and dried skin and muscle were scattered around its base. I felt my heart race faster and faster as I came close to these strange and hideous shrines, the traces, I supposed, of the ancient polytheists. On the walls, I could see, were many carved shapes and patterns, none of which I knew. I was growing more and more uneasy, as were my companions. The horses were perfectly calm, however, and in fact went to sleep. We huddled near the door, listening for the hoofs of the Bedouin, our backs turned to the wicked idols behind us, not one of us wishing to look upon them again. Then, through some evil charm or power dwelling in that place, each of us became terribly weary and fell asleep, leaving no one to watch. I passed into a dream, in which it was as if I were sitting atop a high pillar in the middle of the Bosporus, watching the clouds scuttle by. I sat there for what seemed like centuries. I do not even now know just how much time passed while we were in this state.

When we awoke, we thought ourselves still in our cavern fortress, but we were not. I attempted to light a candle, as they had all gone out, but no spark would come. The darkness was complete, and I could not see my hand in front of my face. I searched in vain for the entrance, hoping to see starlight through the cracks in our wall, but I could see nothing. All was black. I called for my companions, unable to see them, and they replied, saying that they too could see nothing. We did not hear our horses, and could not find them or our baggage as we flailed about on hands and knees. Suddenly, I remembered my terrible vision, and it was as if I had returned to that vision, and knew what would next occur. We were not in the cavern in which we had taken refuge from the Bedouin. I do not think we were in a place in this world. We had passed through into another world, the spirits of its particularities communicating with our world, yet distinct from it, and filled with hatred and rage towards our world and all other worlds. That is what I have concluded, from what I have seen and felt, and from what I know of the knowledge of the Way. You know, my brother, how some of the Friends of God can fold time and space and pass from one place to another, or one time to another, with utter ease. Something of this nature happened to us, though it was not, I believe, the same. I cannot clarify everything that has happened, or that is now happening. I do not know the name of the evil we encountered in those depths, but I know that we have not escaped it. It is not of our world, but it is here. It will not rest, my brother, and its hunger is great.

My hand is now trembling and my eyes grow weary and red, my brother in the spiritual Way, so I must cease writing for now. And there are things I dare not put to paper. But there is much more I must tell you. We will soon make for Erzurum, and I will head west, while the Armenian vardapet, about whom, God willing, I will relate to you, and his companions are returning to Erevan. We fear what may follow us along paths unknown to mortal men. I will write to you again when I come to Trebizon. The snows are deep and cold, so our journey will be long. I do not know if this letter will reach you. There are many things I no longer know. I entrust you and myself and our companions to God. We take refuge in Him.

Part i.

Part ii.